Who am I? What am I an expert on?

The first question is an easy one. I'm a wife, first. Thanks to the man who gave me that title, I'm also a mom. I'm a birth mom and a foster mom. I'm a boy mom and a girl mom. I'm an ambitious mom and a lazy mom. I'm a fancy mom two days a week and a pajamas-all-day mom the other five.

I'm a mom.

I feel like at this point in my life, that's who I am. I like it.

I always wanted to be a mom. I told my husband, Alex, on our first date, sitting across a booth eating my chicken strips and drinking my Dr. Pepper, "I'm going to be a stay-at-home mom. I'll budge on a lot of things, but not that." I'm not a direct person and normally struggle to tell people what I want or how I feel. I have no idea what gave me the push to throw that out there, but I was determined not to waste my time with a guy that didn't value my dream.

He gave me a big smile, which is the only way he smiles, and said, "Awesome."

Bing, bang, boom. Five months later we were engaged. Seven months after that, I married my best friend and moved to a tiny white house, 45 miles from a grocery store. That whole transition deserves a post, or five, of its own.

When we found out we were pregnant we decided to take the plunge and build our forever (hopefully) home. We built it right in the middle of a pasture and our wild child was born three weeks after the move.

Luke's five now and a spitting image of his daddy. He's a mama's boy 100% though. Don't pick on me or there's a good chance you'll get a stink eye or a toe stomped on. He's a little old man. He can spot an elderly person a mile away and always makes a point to go sit with them and swap stories. Actually there isn't much swapping - Luke tells more stories than he listens to.

 

Alex and his mini me with
his mini pony

After a lot of prayer and trust, we dove into foster care. We didn't slowly stick our toes in like normal people, we cannonballed in and said yes to two babies. We have had a 6 month old, Kingston, since he was 4 days old. He loves to eat, is super snuggly, and has the fluffiest hair I've ever had the luxury to touch. We also have a 2 month old, Sophia, who we've had since she was a month old. She's the spitfire of the group, but her smiles are enough to brighten any day, and she has the best dimples in the whole world. My hands and heart have literally never been this full.

These three beautiful kiddos make me a mom. They rock my socks off, and they must rock their socks off, because there are socks all over this house.

As you can see, this is not a fashion blog.
If you're looking for cool outfits,
I can't help you. 

What am I an expert on?

Nothing really.

Boy, that was anticlimactic.

I spread myself out over all the things I love to do. I master none of it, and I'm ok with that. I always try to learn more, work hard, and be better - but I'll be honest, I'm no pro at any of it. I won't have anything novel and new and exciting that only the experts know. I just have our experiences as we try to get through a chaotic life on a ranch with only each other to talk to.

I love taking the kids on adventures and doing something unusual and memorable every day. Whether it's packing up and working bison with Alex, or delivering cookies to neighbors, or playing hide-and-seek in a corn field - I try every day to let them experience life to the fullest. We don't have a zoo, children's museum, or library anywhere close to us, so I try to make up for that. Our chickens, goats, bison, yak, dog, and miniature pony replace the zoo. My teaching degree and wild ideas replace the museum. My book obsession replaces the library. It may not be as good as the real deal, but this is a one woman show. Some days it's a shit show - but a show nonetheless.

I love our Lord and I love talking to Luke about Him. We read from the Bible, do crafts that go along with it, and ask for the graces of the person we read about. I love our Catholic faith - we read about saints and martyrs on their feast days - they're such great examples to us. We must say "Yes" to God, no matter what the cost. Trials in life bring us closer to Christ, and I'm thankful I can learn from them instead of being called to be thrown into fire or be beheaded myself.

I love fostering - I love babies. I love, love, love these two babies. Some days are wonderful and some days make me cry. Some days I feel like I dominated motherhood and some days I feel like it dominated me. I'll share my good days and bad - I'll ask to be lifted up in prayer, so prepare yourself for that.

I have a love/hate relationship with gardening. The timer on the hose is making me love it more but I hate weeding with a passion. I think it's so important to grow my own food - it makes me proud as a ranch wife to look at a plate and see my husband and I's hard work; everything from the meat to the vegetables comes from our ranch. However, I'm definitely not a "from scratch/healthy eater" all the time. I'll never turn down a beer with chislic and spicy cheese balls from our local bar (hint, hint, Alex).

I better wrap this up, I'm going to start reaching for skills and give you false hope on what I know how to do. If I'm mentioning gardening, that's a pretty good sign I'm scraping the bottom of my barrel.

This is me. This is my life. This is parenting in a pasture.



Tonight's prayer request is for all the moms who have children in foster care. Pray that they can find healing in their loss and struggles. Pray that they can come to know God's love, mercy, and forgiveness.